R-E-S-P-E-C-T

by Bruce Brady

Lately I’ve witnessed a lot of people behaving as if they were entitled to special treatment. They display this perceived entitlement by treating others as inferior people and talking down to them. It amazes me that many of us have come to believe the best way to get respect from others is to demand it. Yet, our human nature causes us to resent and even lash out at those who demand anything from us. So how can we justify mistreating others to get what we want?

In Matthew 5:7, Jesus says, “God blesses those who are merciful, for they will be shown mercy.” There is no mention of God rewarding those who insist on having things their way.  We’re foolish if we expect others to love us when we our actions display disrespect and contempt for them. God very clearly teaches that to get what we want; we must first give others the love and respect they want.

Our call is not to half-heartedly follow Christ in order to obtain our selfish desires, it’s to truly serve others as a way of demonstrating our total commitment to living the life Jesus lays out for us. We are to display the merciful love of Christ toward everyone. It’s okay to hate poor behavior and misguided beliefs, but we must love all people as Jesus does. Rather than condemn, He lovingly corrects our sinful actions, and instructs us to interact with others in this same manner.

Throughout our day, we will encounter people who are behaving poorly. When we do, let’s remember that God loves them as much as He loves us and respond with love and kindness. Doing so will not only disarm them; it will also please our Father.

Amazingly, the self-help gurus tell us the key to success and the best way to get what we want is to help others get what they want. I wonder where they got that idea?

A Note To Mom

by Bruce Brady

Tomorrow is Mother’s Day; a time when we all stop to remember mom. But do I really honor her as commanded in Exodus 20:12 and Ephesians 6:3? Sadly, I’ve often only honored her the way most of the world “honors” their mothers, with material gifts and a quick phone call.

Today, God has placed a burden on my heart, for which I’m thankful because I need to reflect on all she’s done for me. Yes there have been those times when she acted selfishly, she’s human after all. But most of the time she sacrificed her desires and her time for my sister, my brother and me. And I don’t thank her enough. Even when I’m helping her, I get bogged down in the task and forget to let my actions show how much I love and appreciate her. So, I’m determined to change that.

Mom, I love you, more than I’ve ever expressed with words and actions. I appreciate all you did and the sacrifices you made to raise me. I’m sorry for those times when I dishonored you through my mistakes, and my half-hearted compliance with your requests. I regret the many times I disappointed you, and treated you with disrespect. Forgive me for all the times I’m sure I hurt you by acting selfishly.

I love you, mom. I would not be here, writing this note and pursuing a writing career if not for your encouragement and guidance. Left to my own devices, I’d probably be dead. I know you did the best you knew how. It wasn’t easy raising three children on your own, especially three very independent children. I appreciate all the times you comforted me when my heart was broken. I’m grateful for your efforts to ensure I had a happy and prosperous life. I understand you did what you did because you wanted a better life for me.

I also admire how, as a young woman suffering the pain of a broken marriage, you packed up a newborn baby and two very young children, moved us 1500 miles to a place where you only knew your brother and his family, and started a new life for us. Thankfully you instilled that same courage and tenacity in me. I’m thankful you never made choices that put us in harm’s way. I appreciate that you worked a second and sometimes third job to make sure we always had food, a safe home and clothing. I’m grateful that you sacrificed to allow us to pursue our educational and extracurricular interests. And I’m thankful that you devoted yourself to spending as much time as you could with us.

Mom, you’re a wonderful woman. And though I can’t be there, I want you to know that, in spirit, I’m with you this Mother’s Day weekend, admiring the amazing woman you are. I hope you can feel my arms embracing you as I say. “I love you, mom, more than words can express.”

Show the Way

“You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.” Matthew 5:14-16

God never calls us to continue living like we did before. He always calls us to live an exemplary life, one that will display His love, mercy and grace. He calls us to not only follow Him but to show others how to follow Him through our words and actions.

We can’t follow Him and be “Closet Christians.” We are fooling ourselves if we think we can act like Jesus on Sunday and then go back to pleasing ourselves and the world on Monday. Those of us who live that way will, in the end, hear God say, “depart, I do not know you.”

Live as God wants us to live. Love everyone as Jesus loves us. This doesn’t mean we must like what they do; it means we must separate the person from the action. We must recognize that everyone is created by God, so we must love them and help them to see the error of their ways with gentleness and compassion. We must also extend to them the same mercy Jesus extends to us. We can’t take revenge on those who hurt us, physically or emotionally, and expect God to show us mercy when we hurt others.

Because of the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross, God graciously adopts us into His family when we accept His gift of salvation through the blood of Jesus and commit ourselves to following His lead. His grace overlooks our mistakes and considers them erased. So part of following His lead is extending this same grace to our fellow human beings.

All people are created by God and made in His image. He does not make some good and some bad. We choose how to live our lives and must deal with consequences. And His word tells us what those consequences will be, so we shouldn’t be surprised when our selfish actions result in less than perfect outcomes.

Let’s take up our crosses, go into the world and be shining examples of the wonderful life that comes from truly following Christ. Then, we can be real friends to others, and, in the end, we can hear Him say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

True Happiness

by Bruce Brady

In Luke 6:45 (NLT), God tells us, "A good person produces good deeds from a good heart, and an evil person produces evil deeds from an evil heart. Whatever is in your heart determines what you say." This tells us that our actions and words reveal who we really are. And that we best relate to others by being open and honest.

As a writer, I know people can tell if I'm being honest by the words I use. They know if my statements are coming from my heart or from a world view that says, "Tell them what they want to hear, then you'll gain wealth and popularity." However, doing anything just for the sake or earthly rewards will never provide true joy and peace. The only sure way to happiness is to follow the heart God gives us, without regard for material rewards.

It's true that some evil people will experience worldly success. But they will not truly be happy because they have to spend their lives worrying about how to keep what they have from others. And, in the end, they will be placed in a box, dropped into a hole and covered with dirt. All their stuff will be left behind to be divided up by the very people whom they spent their lives trying to keep it from. So what have they really accomplished?

For true happiness, follow God's lead and be true to the heart He gives you. It's your choice. Lovingly share His message to you with the world. Serve Him by serving others in a way that will enrich their lives. Then you will know the joy and peace that surpasses all understanding. And you will have true riches.

Oh, That Face!

by Bruce Brady

Most everyone knows a face that lights up a room. It’s a face you long to see, as often as possible.

I am blessed to know such a face. Whenever I see it, my heart leaps in my chest and I smile, inside and out. I awake every morning wanting to see that face. The vision of that face is the perfect start to my day. It inspires me to do much of all I do. It has affected me like this since I first saw it over 30 years ago.

One of my greatest goals in life is to keep a smile on that face. When it smiles, it takes my breath away and all is right with the world. To see it smile makes whatever I’m doing worth the effort, no matter the task, and it eases my cares.

The face I speak of is the face of my lover, my wife. She is still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known or seen. She is, and always will be, my earthly reason for living. In fact, it is her face that led me to God.

Should you ever find yourself having a rough time, do whatever it takes to put a smile on your lover’s face. I believe you’ll find this will make your day go much better. You can’t have a bad day when you turn your attention to serving others. And that is one of our greatest callings on earth.

Have An Affair!

Ever have one of those days when you find yourself wondering why you got married? You know the kind of day I mean—a day, week or month when you and your spouse seem to be at odds about everything.

These dry spells happen in all marriages. They happen when we allow life’s stresses or our selfish natures to consume our attention. If we continue down these paths, our marriages will deteriorate to the point where find ourselves living as two strangers under the same roof. I’ve seen it happen in countless marriages, including my own. This happened to my wife and me because we were certain all was well with our relationship – we took each other for granted.

The truth is that a good marriage is one of God’s strongest forces. He tells us He is present where two are gathered in His name (Matthew 18:20). He also tells to keep anything from separating us because we are no longer two but one (Matthew 19:5-6). Satan knows these truths and will do whatever he can to destroy marriages. But his attacks are usually subtle. He uses our selfishness and worldly pleasures to lull us into ignoring our spiritual bonds with one another. And, like it or not, we’re human and easily drawn to anything that provides self-satisfaction. We can even be self-serving in our “godly” activities.

Assuming our marriages will last forever, we turn our focus to the niceties of life. Having checked off marriage on our “To Do” list, we succumb to worldly pressures and pursue worldly pleasures. Keeping up with all the latest and greatest for ourselves or even our children steals our focus. Our income, status, family activities and other “stuff” take priority over our relationships with God and our spouse.

So how do we keep the love fire burning? Have an affair! Not with someone else, with your spouse. And be sure to include the Lord.

When I finally got over myself and listened to the Holy Spirit’s promptings, I arranged a 3-day surprise getaway. However, unlike our usual “getaways,” it didn’t involve our kids or grandkids – just the two of us. And it wasn’t anything elaborate, just a 2-night stay in a small town hotel, close to home. The only planned activity was a free, 30-minute drive through a small town that covers its buildings and homes with Christmas lights (my wife loves Christmas). The most important activity was simply finding spending time together. We simply listened to the Lord, looked at each other through His eyes and fell in love all over again, after 30 years of marriage.

Indescribable joy will fill you when you allow the Lord to take charge of your marriage. He will show us perfections where we see faults. He shows us how much more rewarding it is to serve others than ourselves. Seeing your spouse through God’s eyes will result in a deeper love for your spouse, and Him. It was an experienced that brought me to my emotional knees.

  

So stop focusing on what’s wrong with your spouse. Give control of your relationship to the Lord. Let Him constantly remind you of why your marriage is so important. He’ll give you a new perspective and an action plan that will bless your marriage with renewed passion, joy and excitement.

Defenders For Children

By Bruce Brady

We have a local organization called “Defenders for Children” that is fighting to end child abuse in the Greenville, SC area and beyond. I’ve joined this group because I believe children are God’s most precious gift to us and we need to protect them. This can only be accomplished by each of us doing whatever we can to prevent their being harmed, and helping abusers to deal with their issues in a healthy way. Take a look at your community and see what you can do to help put an end to the death of children at the hands of angry and misguided parents and other adults.

As Christians, it’s our collective responsibility to help raise all children. Not just those who are born into our families or are members of our church, but all children. We are called to live lives that set Godly examples for all children to follow. Pray that God will show us how to do our part and that we’ll be obedient to His call. Let’s live our lives as if everything we do is teaching children how to live, because they’re watching.

God bless the children and God bless you. Please watch this BBC News video and share your comments with me and all your friends.

 

America's child death shame

www.bbc.co.uk

The BBC investigates the scale of child abuse in the US.

My Back And I Are Back

by Bruce Brady

The more I pushed myself, the more trouble my back gave me. My plan was to ignore the pain and press on. After all, I had a thousand things to do and only I could do them. So I scheduled several sessions with the Chiropractor and filled the rest of my calendar with “Honey-dos.” However, my back had other plans. And my adjustments and activities just made it worse.

I decided to just give my back a rest while I rested in God. Naturally, that did more good than any treatments I’ve had. Except for the occasional pang, my back is completely normal. As for me, I’m not sure I’ve ever been.

In all this, God re-taught me a valuable lesson. I knew it already but lost sight of it in my self-sufficiency. He reminded me that He can do all things, not me. I can do all things, but only through Christ who strengthens me. The key here is He, not I, provides the strength.

So why the back injury? I really needed to slow down and refocus on Him. I had slipped into my all too familiar mode of “Bruce Almighty.” I needed to be sat down. I often do. I was raised to be self-sufficient. My mantra was, “If you want something done right, do it yourself.” Paul had his thorn in the side, this is one of mine. Yes, I need several to keep me in line.

God uses many things to get my attention, this time He chose physical aliment. I could have become bitter but knew it was for my own good. Even in tough times, He is still God and I still love Him. No the pain wasn’t pleasant. It was excruciating at times. Had it been tolerable, I would have ignored it, and Him. One of the most valuable things God teaches us is who we are.

If you find yourself hurting, ill or troubled, don’t ask, “Why me?” Instead, ask God to show you why? Sometimes the answer is just that we over did it or we just caught the latest illness going around. But sometimes He is trying to get our attention to keep us from traveling the wrong road…one that would do us much more harm than good.

When He Calls, He Provides.

Today is the first day of rehearsal for my church’s Easter Pageant. I didn’t think it would happen. I didn’t think so because I couldn’t see it happening. Just last Thursday, I held a meeting for all cast members and only 8 people showed up; I expected about 20. The other 20 or so parts hadn’t been cast yet. Not for a lack of trying but because our Pageant takes place during Spring Break for our schools. Between the fear of public speaking and Spring Break plans, my casting efforts were met with stiff resistance. I struggled for 3 weeks just to get the 20 cast members I thought I had and our church has between 4,000 and 5,000 members. So you understand my frustration.

Now, another week has gone by and I have all the characters cast with extras I may have to write into the script because I don’t want to discourage anyone. The Music Minister and a couple of members who teach Bible Study classes worked their networks and the additional parts were filled in 4 days. All I did was follow up with a phone call and informational e-mail afterward. It was a wonderful thing to witness.

Most importantly, I was taught another lesson by my loving Father. He reminded me that when He calls us to do something for Him, He provides all our needs. I recalled all the times in His Word when He tells us to keep our focus on Him and He will take care of the rest. In Proverbs 3: 5-6 He tells us that when we don’t rely on our own understanding but think about Him in every situation, He will show us the way to go and what to do. The problem is that it is not natural for us to give control to someone else. Our very nature wants to be in charge of our life. But when we do give Him control, it always works out better than we can do on our own, and in perfect timing. Remember, God is our Father and He wants bless us with good things. So, if we’ll give Him our concerns, hopes and plans, He will show us the best way to handle them.

The Calling Is Only The Beginning…

I recently discovered that I answered several calls from God, asked Him what to do with them, but left Him out of the prioritizing process. Boy, did that take a toll on me. Without asking Him how to prioritize my projects, I dove in, head first, thinking I could perfectly conquer three major projects with no problems. However, God had other plans for my exuberance.

While trying to write, cast, direct and produce my church’s Easter Pageant, I also tried to enclose and roof my deck, and write query letters and articles for my new writing career. Needless to say, all suffered. None were done as well as they could have been if I simply determined to do one at a time and give it my all each time. No matter how proficient we think we are at multi-tasking, we’re never as good as we could be. Simple reason tells us that focusing all of our energy and our best effort on one task will produce far superior results when compared to multi-tasking.

God tells us how important it is to follow His lead and focus on one thing He deems most critical at any given time. Look at His chosen leaders throughout history. Not one of them was a multi-tasker. They all worked with single-minded purpose. And, they all followed God’s lead, working on what He deemed most important, doing nothing independent of Him. That’s the reason they succeeded. And, when they took matters into their own hands, they failed or produced less than the best results. Moses successfully led God’s people for over 40 years. But the one time he pushed God, he lost his chance to cross over into the Promised Land.

The bottom line is that when we are called, it is only the beginning of our journey with God and we can’t say, “Okay God, I’ll take it from here.” You see, He doesn’t call us because He wants us to do His work for Him, He calls us to do His work with Him. The whole purpose of His calling is to cultivate our relationship with Him. It’s not just to have us do tasks. We’re not His employees, we’re His adopted children. He doesn’t call us because He wants us to do the jobs He doesn’t want to do. He calls us because He loves us and wants us to grow into the persons He designed us to be. He calls us because in His entire created universe we are most important to Him.

So, when He calls, answer with a resounding, “Yes, Father.” Then follow that answer with a question, “What do I do now, Father?” Then wait for His answer and follow His lead.

A Storm's Silver Lining

A storm is blowing into our neighborhood. As I listen to the wind howling through the trees and the rain pounding on the windows, I’m reminded how much my life used to be like this storm. Before I knew God, I would howl and pound, and manipulate, in an attempt to get my own way. And if I failed, I would storm off, absorbed in an inner rage that would rule over me for a long time, the memory of that failure returning often for several months or years after. No different than anyone’s, my human nature would keep me tied up in emotional knots because I failed to get my own way. You see, human nature makes all of us selfishly competitive which leads to all kinds of negative health issues and sinful thoughts. I can’t count the number of times I injured and killed people, at least in my thoughts, because they prevented me from obtaining my own egocentric desires.

Thankfully God didn’t give up on me. Actually, He doesn’t give up on anybody which is why we are still waiting for Christ’s return. Understanding His patience is difficult at best. However, I am eternally grateful that He is patient because it saved my life and my soul. I’m not saying that I became immediately altruistic. Not even close. My self-centered nature fought long and hard to stay in control. But God is patiently molding me into the humble, charitable, unselfish person He created me to be. When I look at where I came from, I can see He has made enormous changes in me over the past 30 years. Today, more often than not, I prioritize the welfare of others over my own. However, His work is not yet done.

One thing I have learned is how wonderful He makes me feel when I answer His call to help others. I’m no longer helping others to primarily benefit myself. He has transformed me to the point where I can honestly help others with no concern for “what’s in it for me?” The real beauty of this is that when I allow Him to work through me to serve others, He provides much greater joy and rewards than selfishness ever could.

So are you fighting His calling like I did? Are you walking with God but not submitting to His control? Why not take a chance? Let Him lead your every step for a month, a week and see if you don’t find much less stress in your life. Let Him take the lead and enjoy the wonderful peace and joy that He provides. Life can be a wonderful adventure if we’ll just let Him be our guide.

It’s Never Just About You…

Today I wrote a brief article for “RealityWriting.net” and realized something that has been true whenever God talks to me, guides me and corrects me. It’s never been just about me. As I was writing the article, the Holy Spirit gently showed me how even my most personal lessons from God have a profound effect on others. He never really does something just for me alone. And that is because He loves us all and wants us all to be positive influences in the lives of everyone else. God is calling all of us to be better people; people who care about others more than ourselves.

Think of Jesus’ life. His whole life was about benefiting others. He promised us that the more we serve others, the more we will be rewarded, but this should not be our motivation. If it is, then we are still all about ourselves. I understand that we begin life with a self-focus. Most everything we do is motivated by how our actions will benefit us. Yet God has promised that the more selfless we are, the more we will truly benefit in an eternal way. And the eternal is so much more important than the now. But He doesn’t ignore the now. He rewards our selfless service by blessing us with great personal joy and by meeting all our needs.

As I eluded to in previous posts, I very recently, December 2010, started a new venture as a writer. I did so at the urging of a good friend and the prompting of the Holy Spirit. This was an answer to prayer that I had been seeking for many years. What I didn’t mention before is that 2 months before that, I began another new venture as the director of our church’s Drama Ministry. I also had never done this before but the God assured me that He wanted me to do it. And, last month, I began re-flooring my deck and, with the help of an experienced friend, building a roof over it. So, in three months time I began three new ventures, none of which I had any experience in. I’m not telling you this to blow my own horn. I’m telling you this because I want you to know that when God calls you to do something, He doesn’t care about your lack of experience, or your background, or your age or any other human condition, He only cares that you are willing to trust Him enough to take a leap of pure faith.

I wasn’t what I considered a writer, I’m not an ordained minister or even a staff member of my church and I’m not a contractor or builder. I’m just a man who loves God, is grateful for the price He paid for me and is willing to go where He leads me. At first, following Him was scary because I had no control over where I would go or what I would do, and I like being in control. However, my early baby-steps of faith resulted in unimaginable joy, so now I happily jump when God calls. I sometimes get nervous because I still consider my personal shortcomings, but I know God doesn’t care about those. Thus, it is ever easier and more exciting for me to take hold of the new challenges He sets before me.

Is God calling you to do something completely scary; something you’ve never done before? If so, take a leap of faith. Follow His lead. If you need the assistance of others, He will lead you to them. Remember, He says in His Word that when we put our faith in Him and seek wise counsel our plans will succeed. 

Listening Isn’t Easy!

God tells us to trust Him and He will take care of all our needs, He will protect us from those who would hurt us and He will surround us with people who care about us. So why do we have such a tough time listening?

One reason we find listening hard is because we each have a constant internal dialogue that keeps us distracted, even when we are most focused. It is difficult to turn it off, accomplish complete internal silence and then wait, quietly, for His voice. I know that whenever I try to shut off my internal dialogue, I never completely succeed. The closest I have ever come is reaching the point where my only thoughts are, “I must be quiet.” Of course, that is still internal dialogue. Thankfully, God is able to get my attention long enough to convey His message to me. He is able to do this because He is God and because my heart wants to hear from Him, even though I can’t quiet my thoughts.

Another reason we can’t hear Him is because of our selfishness. Sometimes we just know that if we let God speak, He will tell us to stop what we are doing, or that we can’t have what we want. This is not what we want to hear. Being born with a naturally sinful nature ensures it will take deliberate effort on our part to turn from our own desires and seek His way for ourselves. To reach this point is far more difficult than turning off our inner voice, and far more important. Quieting the voice in our head is just a matter of cutting through the noise, but turning from our own selfish ways and desires takes a deliberate choice that goes against our natural inclination. However, we must accomplish both if we truly want to hear from God, and we must accomplish both all day, every day.

The good news is that God wants to give His best to us. He wants us to succeed beyond our wildest dreams. He wants to bless us in ways we don’t even know we want. He wants us to have great, loving relationships with Him and everyone. He wants us to have earthly and heavenly rewards that will make us better people and give us great joy. He wants to take care of us like nobody else will or can. All we have to do is try to quiet our inner voice, yield our will to His and listen for His calling.