R-E-S-P-E-C-T

by Bruce Brady

Lately I’ve witnessed a lot of people behaving as if they were entitled to special treatment. They display this perceived entitlement by treating others as inferior people and talking down to them. It amazes me that many of us have come to believe the best way to get respect from others is to demand it. Yet, our human nature causes us to resent and even lash out at those who demand anything from us. So how can we justify mistreating others to get what we want?

In Matthew 5:7, Jesus says, “God blesses those who are merciful, for they will be shown mercy.” There is no mention of God rewarding those who insist on having things their way.  We’re foolish if we expect others to love us when we our actions display disrespect and contempt for them. God very clearly teaches that to get what we want; we must first give others the love and respect they want.

Our call is not to half-heartedly follow Christ in order to obtain our selfish desires, it’s to truly serve others as a way of demonstrating our total commitment to living the life Jesus lays out for us. We are to display the merciful love of Christ toward everyone. It’s okay to hate poor behavior and misguided beliefs, but we must love all people as Jesus does. Rather than condemn, He lovingly corrects our sinful actions, and instructs us to interact with others in this same manner.

Throughout our day, we will encounter people who are behaving poorly. When we do, let’s remember that God loves them as much as He loves us and respond with love and kindness. Doing so will not only disarm them; it will also please our Father.

Amazingly, the self-help gurus tell us the key to success and the best way to get what we want is to help others get what they want. I wonder where they got that idea?

A Note To Mom

by Bruce Brady

Tomorrow is Mother’s Day; a time when we all stop to remember mom. But do I really honor her as commanded in Exodus 20:12 and Ephesians 6:3? Sadly, I’ve often only honored her the way most of the world “honors” their mothers, with material gifts and a quick phone call.

Today, God has placed a burden on my heart, for which I’m thankful because I need to reflect on all she’s done for me. Yes there have been those times when she acted selfishly, she’s human after all. But most of the time she sacrificed her desires and her time for my sister, my brother and me. And I don’t thank her enough. Even when I’m helping her, I get bogged down in the task and forget to let my actions show how much I love and appreciate her. So, I’m determined to change that.

Mom, I love you, more than I’ve ever expressed with words and actions. I appreciate all you did and the sacrifices you made to raise me. I’m sorry for those times when I dishonored you through my mistakes, and my half-hearted compliance with your requests. I regret the many times I disappointed you, and treated you with disrespect. Forgive me for all the times I’m sure I hurt you by acting selfishly.

I love you, mom. I would not be here, writing this note and pursuing a writing career if not for your encouragement and guidance. Left to my own devices, I’d probably be dead. I know you did the best you knew how. It wasn’t easy raising three children on your own, especially three very independent children. I appreciate all the times you comforted me when my heart was broken. I’m grateful for your efforts to ensure I had a happy and prosperous life. I understand you did what you did because you wanted a better life for me.

I also admire how, as a young woman suffering the pain of a broken marriage, you packed up a newborn baby and two very young children, moved us 1500 miles to a place where you only knew your brother and his family, and started a new life for us. Thankfully you instilled that same courage and tenacity in me. I’m thankful you never made choices that put us in harm’s way. I appreciate that you worked a second and sometimes third job to make sure we always had food, a safe home and clothing. I’m grateful that you sacrificed to allow us to pursue our educational and extracurricular interests. And I’m thankful that you devoted yourself to spending as much time as you could with us.

Mom, you’re a wonderful woman. And though I can’t be there, I want you to know that, in spirit, I’m with you this Mother’s Day weekend, admiring the amazing woman you are. I hope you can feel my arms embracing you as I say. “I love you, mom, more than words can express.”

Oh, That Face!

by Bruce Brady

Most everyone knows a face that lights up a room. It’s a face you long to see, as often as possible.

I am blessed to know such a face. Whenever I see it, my heart leaps in my chest and I smile, inside and out. I awake every morning wanting to see that face. The vision of that face is the perfect start to my day. It inspires me to do much of all I do. It has affected me like this since I first saw it over 30 years ago.

One of my greatest goals in life is to keep a smile on that face. When it smiles, it takes my breath away and all is right with the world. To see it smile makes whatever I’m doing worth the effort, no matter the task, and it eases my cares.

The face I speak of is the face of my lover, my wife. She is still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known or seen. She is, and always will be, my earthly reason for living. In fact, it is her face that led me to God.

Should you ever find yourself having a rough time, do whatever it takes to put a smile on your lover’s face. I believe you’ll find this will make your day go much better. You can’t have a bad day when you turn your attention to serving others. And that is one of our greatest callings on earth.

Have An Affair!

Ever have one of those days when you find yourself wondering why you got married? You know the kind of day I mean—a day, week or month when you and your spouse seem to be at odds about everything.

These dry spells happen in all marriages. They happen when we allow life’s stresses or our selfish natures to consume our attention. If we continue down these paths, our marriages will deteriorate to the point where find ourselves living as two strangers under the same roof. I’ve seen it happen in countless marriages, including my own. This happened to my wife and me because we were certain all was well with our relationship – we took each other for granted.

The truth is that a good marriage is one of God’s strongest forces. He tells us He is present where two are gathered in His name (Matthew 18:20). He also tells to keep anything from separating us because we are no longer two but one (Matthew 19:5-6). Satan knows these truths and will do whatever he can to destroy marriages. But his attacks are usually subtle. He uses our selfishness and worldly pleasures to lull us into ignoring our spiritual bonds with one another. And, like it or not, we’re human and easily drawn to anything that provides self-satisfaction. We can even be self-serving in our “godly” activities.

Assuming our marriages will last forever, we turn our focus to the niceties of life. Having checked off marriage on our “To Do” list, we succumb to worldly pressures and pursue worldly pleasures. Keeping up with all the latest and greatest for ourselves or even our children steals our focus. Our income, status, family activities and other “stuff” take priority over our relationships with God and our spouse.

So how do we keep the love fire burning? Have an affair! Not with someone else, with your spouse. And be sure to include the Lord.

When I finally got over myself and listened to the Holy Spirit’s promptings, I arranged a 3-day surprise getaway. However, unlike our usual “getaways,” it didn’t involve our kids or grandkids – just the two of us. And it wasn’t anything elaborate, just a 2-night stay in a small town hotel, close to home. The only planned activity was a free, 30-minute drive through a small town that covers its buildings and homes with Christmas lights (my wife loves Christmas). The most important activity was simply finding spending time together. We simply listened to the Lord, looked at each other through His eyes and fell in love all over again, after 30 years of marriage.

Indescribable joy will fill you when you allow the Lord to take charge of your marriage. He will show us perfections where we see faults. He shows us how much more rewarding it is to serve others than ourselves. Seeing your spouse through God’s eyes will result in a deeper love for your spouse, and Him. It was an experienced that brought me to my emotional knees.

  

So stop focusing on what’s wrong with your spouse. Give control of your relationship to the Lord. Let Him constantly remind you of why your marriage is so important. He’ll give you a new perspective and an action plan that will bless your marriage with renewed passion, joy and excitement.

My Back And I Are Back

by Bruce Brady

The more I pushed myself, the more trouble my back gave me. My plan was to ignore the pain and press on. After all, I had a thousand things to do and only I could do them. So I scheduled several sessions with the Chiropractor and filled the rest of my calendar with “Honey-dos.” However, my back had other plans. And my adjustments and activities just made it worse.

I decided to just give my back a rest while I rested in God. Naturally, that did more good than any treatments I’ve had. Except for the occasional pang, my back is completely normal. As for me, I’m not sure I’ve ever been.

In all this, God re-taught me a valuable lesson. I knew it already but lost sight of it in my self-sufficiency. He reminded me that He can do all things, not me. I can do all things, but only through Christ who strengthens me. The key here is He, not I, provides the strength.

So why the back injury? I really needed to slow down and refocus on Him. I had slipped into my all too familiar mode of “Bruce Almighty.” I needed to be sat down. I often do. I was raised to be self-sufficient. My mantra was, “If you want something done right, do it yourself.” Paul had his thorn in the side, this is one of mine. Yes, I need several to keep me in line.

God uses many things to get my attention, this time He chose physical aliment. I could have become bitter but knew it was for my own good. Even in tough times, He is still God and I still love Him. No the pain wasn’t pleasant. It was excruciating at times. Had it been tolerable, I would have ignored it, and Him. One of the most valuable things God teaches us is who we are.

If you find yourself hurting, ill or troubled, don’t ask, “Why me?” Instead, ask God to show you why? Sometimes the answer is just that we over did it or we just caught the latest illness going around. But sometimes He is trying to get our attention to keep us from traveling the wrong road…one that would do us much more harm than good.

Are Friendships A Calling?

I realize it’s been a while since I’ve posted and for that I’m truly sorry. Between “honey-dos,” a writers’ conference and illness, I neglected my blog. So please accept my apology.

I’ve spent some time during the past few days sending out “Thank You” e-mails. I realize hand-written notes would be better but I don’t have the recipients’ street addresses. I was expressing my appreciation to a lot of people who contributed to the very uplifting experience I had at the conference. These wonderful people inspired me to pursue my passion for writing with an even greater conviction and I wanted to let them know how much I value them.

Writing these notes, I realized just how important it is for all of us to express our love and caring for others. Usually we go through life assuming others know how we feel about them, but they often don’t. And if they do, they still like to hear (or read) about how much they are appreciated; how much they are loved. For true love is a deep caring about the wellbeing of another. It is the love God displayed when He allowed His Son to die in our stead so that we may walk with Him now and forever.

The need to be loved is very strong in all of us. This is the way God created us. And if we were created to love and be loved then it makes sense that we are all called to love one another. When Jesus was asked what the greatest commandment is, He told us that first and foremost we are to love God completely. But He also told us that the second most important commandment is to love everyone as much as we love ourselves, and that this commandment is just as important as the first. In other words, loving others is the most important calling in life, and one we all share.

Although we all share this same calling, we will each have a unique way of expressing this calling. God did not create us to be robots. There are people in the world who can best be reached by me and there are others who can best be reached by you. So if I don’t answer my calling, then someone else will have to fill in for me; someone who will not relate as well to those others as I would. Thus neglecting my calling will result in a less than optimal outcome in the lives of others. And it could result in others being eternally lost because I didn’t express God’s love for them as I should have.

The bottom line is this. If you are certain of your calling, don’t ignore it. Realize that just because it’s your calling doesn’t mean it will be easy. None of us grow form doing what is easy. Our calling will include challenges and the more important the calling, the more difficult the challenges will be. Just remember, the more difficult the challenges, them greater will be our growth in character.

I Personally Know And Believe In Jesus Christ.

I recently read a Facebook post forwarded from a friend challenging all people to publically proclaim belief in the lordship of Jesus Christ. My first reaction was, “Why is this even out there?” Then I realized that this is not a simple task for most professed Christians. In Matthew 28:19, Jesus commands us to make disciples of all people by teaching them everything He taught us. Yet, you will find very few professed Christians who obey this command. They use many excuses to avoid compliance, but the truth is nearly always fear; the kind of fear that results from worldly pressure.

For years, I lived in fear of being asked the reason for my optimism. I was sure that if I wasn’t threatened by the questioner, I would, at the very least, be completely humiliated by the experience. As I grew in my walk with Jesus, I came to learn from His gentle teaching that my fear was rooted in the fact that I was putting myself first, ahead of Him. Of course I felt guilty when I clearly saw this, but He assured me He still loved me and wanted to walk with me for all eternity. He also assured me that it was normal to have this fear.

You see, we all fear rejection, whether we like to admit it or not. That fear is in our basic human nature. Our human nature is opposed to sharing the “Good News” with others because doing so may cause others to dislike us, or even want to harm us. So, to avoid emotional discomfort or physical harm, we refuse to obey. This doesn’t mean we should be ourselves up about it, it just means we need to see it for what it is, disobedience. When we see this, we merely need to ask God’s forgiveness, knowing it is given the moment we ask if we truly repent, then obey Him the next time an opportunity to share the Gospel arises, and it will.

God has called every one of us to share the “Good News” with everyone we know and meet. However, He did not call us to do so alone. He also promised that He will always be with us; He will never leave us. It is our responsibility to make sure we know and understand the Gospel, for our own benefit and to be ready to answer the questions of others. But He does not expect us to win souls without help. He will always be there to give us the right words to fit every situation and to give us the courage to speak, if we will simply ask Him. And, as an added benefit, whenever we share the hope of salvation with others, God will bless us with a most wonderful joy that words can’t adequately express.

It’s Never Just About You…

Today I wrote a brief article for “RealityWriting.net” and realized something that has been true whenever God talks to me, guides me and corrects me. It’s never been just about me. As I was writing the article, the Holy Spirit gently showed me how even my most personal lessons from God have a profound effect on others. He never really does something just for me alone. And that is because He loves us all and wants us all to be positive influences in the lives of everyone else. God is calling all of us to be better people; people who care about others more than ourselves.

Think of Jesus’ life. His whole life was about benefiting others. He promised us that the more we serve others, the more we will be rewarded, but this should not be our motivation. If it is, then we are still all about ourselves. I understand that we begin life with a self-focus. Most everything we do is motivated by how our actions will benefit us. Yet God has promised that the more selfless we are, the more we will truly benefit in an eternal way. And the eternal is so much more important than the now. But He doesn’t ignore the now. He rewards our selfless service by blessing us with great personal joy and by meeting all our needs.

As I eluded to in previous posts, I very recently, December 2010, started a new venture as a writer. I did so at the urging of a good friend and the prompting of the Holy Spirit. This was an answer to prayer that I had been seeking for many years. What I didn’t mention before is that 2 months before that, I began another new venture as the director of our church’s Drama Ministry. I also had never done this before but the God assured me that He wanted me to do it. And, last month, I began re-flooring my deck and, with the help of an experienced friend, building a roof over it. So, in three months time I began three new ventures, none of which I had any experience in. I’m not telling you this to blow my own horn. I’m telling you this because I want you to know that when God calls you to do something, He doesn’t care about your lack of experience, or your background, or your age or any other human condition, He only cares that you are willing to trust Him enough to take a leap of pure faith.

I wasn’t what I considered a writer, I’m not an ordained minister or even a staff member of my church and I’m not a contractor or builder. I’m just a man who loves God, is grateful for the price He paid for me and is willing to go where He leads me. At first, following Him was scary because I had no control over where I would go or what I would do, and I like being in control. However, my early baby-steps of faith resulted in unimaginable joy, so now I happily jump when God calls. I sometimes get nervous because I still consider my personal shortcomings, but I know God doesn’t care about those. Thus, it is ever easier and more exciting for me to take hold of the new challenges He sets before me.

Is God calling you to do something completely scary; something you’ve never done before? If so, take a leap of faith. Follow His lead. If you need the assistance of others, He will lead you to them. Remember, He says in His Word that when we put our faith in Him and seek wise counsel our plans will succeed. 

Did You Ever Have One Of Those Days?

Ever have one of those days when you start out raring to go and then one distraction after another seems to suck the day away from you? Well, that is the kind of day I had. After my prayer time and Bible study, “things” came up that kept me from doing what I intended. And when I finally felt I had time to get started on my “to-do” list, it was time for me to start dinner. Maybe I’ll just escort my beautiful wife to the car, brave the rain and cold and take her to our favorite restaurant.

Hopefully your day went better than mine. But it seems that if you live anywhere in the U.S., you probably didn’t have a great weather day either. I do hope you asked God to direct your day and were able to accomplish what needed to be done. I thought my goals for the day were His but I may have misunderstood. Apparently He wanted me to learn how to exercise patience in the midst of chaos. I believe I did pretty well and pray I did well enough to avoid another lesson in patience tomorrow.

One thing He did lay on my heart was the lack of good news we get in this country. The news media seems intent trying to depress us by only sharing the worst humanity has to offer. And most do it with a decided editorial bent. So, we should show people that there is goodness in this world. We should show the world that there is a loving, caring God Who will help anyone who comes to Him.  He wants me to share stories of mankind’s acts of goodness. But not just my stories, He wants your stories too. Therefore, if you know of anyone who has done anything good for others without expecting a reward, please share that with me. Post your stories in the comments and I will publish those that best fit the goal.